Moving Away From Tradition
Changing Attitudes Toward Gender Roles
Many brides today are moving away from tradition. Specifically, the bouquet and garter toss, or they’re finding alternative ways to incorporate them. Both the bouquet and garter toss are rooted in old-fashioned ideas about gender roles, relationships, and fertility. These customs, which have roots in medieval Europe, were once seen as essential parts of the wedding reception. However, modern couples often see them as outdated or prefer something that feels more inclusive or comfortable for their guests.
Here are some reasons and alternatives. Many brides and grooms prefer to avoid customs that might feel sexist or uncomfortable, particularly the garter toss, which often involves the groom removing the garter in front of guests.
Awkwardness for Guests
The bouquet and garter toss can create awkward situations for single guests, especially those who don’t enjoy being singled out. This is especially true at weddings where many of the attendees may already be married or aren’t interested in participating.
Desire for a More Inclusive Celebration
Couples today are focusing more on making all guests feel included rather than centering traditions on just single men or women. Some couples choose to do away with these activities altogether to create a more relaxed and less pressured atmosphere.
Popular Alternatives – Love these!
Bouquet Presentation
Instead of throwing the bouquet, brides sometimes choose to present it to someone special—such as a parent, a close friend, or a couple that’s been married the longest—to honor their support and love. This heartfelt gesture adds a personal touch to the wedding.
Anniversary Dance
Couples can hold an anniversary dance, where all married couples join them on the dance floor. As the song progresses, couples who have been married for fewer years are asked to sit down until only the longest-married couple remains. The bride can then present the bouquet to them, celebrating lasting love.
Skip It Altogether!
Overall, while the bouquet and garter toss traditions are still enjoyed by some couples, many are choosing alternatives or omitting them entirely in favor of activities that better reflect their values and ensure all guests feel comfortable and included.